The Ministry of Truth

President: My lack of plan to win in Iraq is better than the Democrats’ lack of plan

“They have no plan for success. Neither do we. But ours is still better.”

President Bush, campaigning aggressively ahead of the high-stakes November 7 elections, said Saturday Democrats should not be trusted to control Congress because, like the Republicans in power, they have no idea how to win in Iraq.

“I want you to think about the Democrat plan for success and then the Republican plan for success — which we’ve demonstrated to you since the beginning,” Bush told thousands of energized Republicans packed into a high school gymnasium. “They will probably leave before the job is done, which I guess is a plan, but it’s a bad plan. If we had a plan, it’d be to ’stay the course,’ but of course, that’s not the plan, never been the plan, and I’ve never even said that.”

“I know things look pretty bad in Iraq, but just remember, they still could get worse… probably… well, maybe,” said Bush. “So what I’m saying is this: changing leadership right now still could have some kind of effect on the situation. It’s not, like, so bad that it doesn’t matter who’s in charge. Not yet.”

Bush was campaigning on behalf of GOP Rep. Mike Sodrel, who quickly distanced himself from the President after the event.